When you cheat on your diet, who are you cheating? Your wallet? Yourself? Your spouse? I say, just yourself. But what do I know...I started a "diet" and I "cheated" (accidentally) within the first week!
I wrote a little while ago about starting the paleo challenge. I'm on my last week, and all I can say is, when everyone in your house isn't joining in on a diet, it's really hard. I have no idea how real dieters are able to lose weight because when your children are too young to get what they need/want to eat (and everything isn't nutritious), it's hard not to take two crackers/Cheez-its/potato chips/cookies for yourself.
I started the challenge not to lose weight, but to feel better, and feel better I do. But I also learned a few things about myself, which I will talk about below. At any rate, I'm glad I did the paleo challenge because I now eat a lot more healthfully and I avoid wheat-based products like the plague.
So, here's what I learned:
My wheat allergy goes much deeper than I thought. Most grasses make me sneeze or break out, and I can't eat rye at all. Whole wheat always made me break out in a rash if I had too much of it, as does beer - but I could eat bleached flour without a problem. Now that I've completely cut gluten from my diet, I don't have aches and pains like I used to, my allergies are better, and let's just say that the monthly curse of being a woman is much, much less painful (TMI?).
I can get past the things I think I love to eat. My go-to snack for awhile has been Cheez-Its. I have no idea how I got started on them, but those little crackers go well with Coke, beer, or water. You can control how many you eat and sometimes two is enough. After three weeks of having had only two Cheez-Its (that was the accidental cheating; I was fixing some for Little P and absent-mindedly took two. When I realised what I'd done, I was disappointed, but I had already swallowed them so I moved on), I no longer even like them. No joke. I tried two of them the other day and they literally tasted like shit and I said, out loud, "I can't believe I used to love these things!". I did the same thing with potato chips (Lays regular, if you're wondering) and had the exact same reaction: they literally tasted like shit to me.
No, I have never eaten shit, but you get the idea. I didn't just "not want them" - they tasted like something I would never, ever eat again. Wow.
I need more carbs than my husband. My husband "accidentally" joined me in the paleo challenge because it intrigued him and he started doing a bunch of research on it. He took it way farther than I did (but he's also still trying to lose a few pounds, and I am not) and I think he's having good results. Unfortunately, without around 120 - 150g of carbohydrates every day, I cannot function and I feel bad. I can't get through the brain fogthat people talk about because I am unable to function, quite literally. Getting off the couch to get a glass of water was an easy thought, but getting up and doing it was nearly impossible one day (and no, I was not starved or anything, just a nearly-zero-carb 36 hours or so). I'm still trying to tweak the magic number but I cannot have a carbohydrate-free day. I like to say that my brain is very active, and that's why. The truth is, I don't really know why.
Changing the way I eat has been really hard. I've never really been on a diet to lose weight. I've tweaked the kinds of calories I've eaten in order to tone up and get in better shape (and the result is sometimes weight loss) but I've never been overweight. I can't imagine what would happen if I reached the point where I had to lose weight, because I would fail miserably. I gained a new respect for anyone who has lost weight and kept it off.
Sometimes, it's OK to cheat. I gave myself permission to cheat after about two weeks on the paleo challenge. Why? Because I was still fighting to maintain my weight, and I wasn't noticing a lot of difference in performance, except for the carbs thing I mentioned above. I don't mean I resorted to sandwiches or cookies; I didn't. But I have had one piece of cake (it was a very special occasion and it would have been very rude not to have eaten it - but it was tiny and I have a new appreciation for the sugar rush!). I also had a few homemade butterscotch brownies. I had a few because one just wasn't enough. It reinforced the fact that gluten bonds to the same receptors in your brain as opiates! I also had a 12-oz can of Coke because after the butterscotch brownies I just decided to say "Screw it" for the day and caved. The Coke was good.
I managed to lay down the law after that though, and even given the brownies and the coke, I only had about 180g of carbs that day, so it tells you a lot about what I had to eat the rest of the day. It taught me that it's OK to cheat, if you are able to get yourself together and not cheat again the next day. Once in awhile is fine though.
The way I eat is probably forever changed. As I mentioned above, I now don't like the taste of some of my previously favourite foods. I suspect it has to do with the partially hydrogenated oils, or perhaps it's the gluten. I'm pretty sure that I will avoid most gluten for the rest of my life. Not to the point of never having a sandwich (which I'm not a huge fan of anyway), but to the point that I will probably limit myself to pizza once a month or so. And yes, I will eat regular pizza, at least on occasion. I'm looking forward to trying a beer, but I'd bet that I either won't like it, or I will have a reaction to it (but maybe not). Processed foods make me sick. I had a Jimmy John's Unwich (instead of bread, they wrap the meat in lettuce), and it was quite tasty. Unfortunately I had a raging headache after eating it. Must have been the preservatives in the meat (it was the kind of headache I get after eating MSG). I'm enjoying grass-fed beef and free-range chicken and organic brown eggs.
I will still eat a cookie and drink a Coke. Not every day mind you, but I still have an appreciation for the finer things in life. But to give you an example, a month ago, if I had Coke in the house, I had to have one - just one - every day until they were gone. Yesterday I bought Mexican Coke (made with sugar instead of high fructose corn syrup) and I'm saving the first one for Sunday, when my challenge is over. Dumb, yes, I know. I'm sure my children will wonder what happened to me when the sugar and caffeine hit me at the same time. As for the cookies, they'll have to be homemade, but what the hell.
So that sums it up. For those of you who have had to interact with me in the real world during the past month, I appreciate your patience. It hasn't all been rosy, but it's been an education, if nothing else! If you're considering trying the paleo challenge, or changing the way you eat for the better, I highly recommend it. What doesn't kill you definitely makes you stronger. :)
*Note: I didn't take before and after pictures because I really didn't think there would be much difference. I wasn't trying to lose weight, and the 3-4 pounds I did lose were inconsequential and actually made me look a tad emaciated. When I have washboard abs, I'll post a picture, I promise. Please don't hold your breath, because the likelihood of getting past my existing 2-pack seems minuscule!
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